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How Internal State Shapes Stories: Nurturing Your Body for Better Narratives

As I shared in my post on the Path to Action , our stories shape our emotions and actions—but our body’s signals inform those stories. Typically, we think of “see and hear” as external evidence, like others’ actions, but an unbalanced internal state sends sensations—hunger, fatigue, inflammation—that tempt us toward negative narratives. I learned this through decades of struggling with psoriasis, depression, and weight. By caring for my body, I transformed those signals, making it easier to choose blame-free stories of hope and connection. Nurturing our physical selves can deepen our connection with others and ourselves. A Long Struggle with Signals Since 1997, I’ve dealt with a recurring rash in an uncomfortable spot. Doctors couldn’t diagnose it, occasionally offering steroid injections or creams that temporarily helped but provided no long-term solution. In 2011, a Seattle dermatologist took a biopsy and identified it as inverse psoriasis, an autoimmune condition. I finally got a pr...
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The Path to Action: Choosing Stories That Lighten Our Burden

I often heard, “Christ never said it would be easy, only that it would be worth it.” But Christ did say, “My yoke is easy, and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:30). This promise puzzled me. If life feels heavy, where is the ease? Through years of prayer, frustration, and failed attempts to change, I sought the core of our agency: where do we choose? How do we truly change? Willpower, medication, and even desperate pleas to God didn’t lift my existential dread or stop my misery. Then I discovered the Path to Action from Crucial Conversations , which revealed that all my emotions come from stories I tell myself—and the heaviest story was blame. By choosing better stories, we yoke ourselves with Christ, living with the peace He promised. The Weight of Blame For decades, I carried a crushing burden. As a child, I carelessly killed a pet hamster and lied to my parents about it. I told myself I was a “liar and a murderer,” a story that colored my life with shame. I blamed my parents—especi...
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Faith and Works: A Journey of Heart

Growing up in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, I’ve always believed that “faith without works is dead” ( James 2:17 ). But recent debates on X about faith versus works—some championing faith alone, others insisting on works—made me pause. The arguments often felt like an I-It clash, with both sides dismissing each other rather than seeking understanding. This prompted me to ask: Why does faith need works, and why do works need faith? I wanted answers grounded in how we live, not just theology. The Path to Action from Crucial Conversations showed me that faith shapes our actions through the stories we tell, while The Anatomy of Peace revealed that works without faith are empty. Preparing this post deepened my respect for the “faith alone” view, with its focus on grace, and showed me that faith and works together reflect the heart’s truth. Faith and works are often debated—some champion faith alone as sufficient, while others see faith and works as deeply intertwine...
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Following the Christmas Star Inward

In ‘ The Thorns of Knowledge ' and ‘ The Truth That Frees Us ,' I explored how stories like Adam and Eve or Christ's life reveal our inner struggles with worth and truth. What if the Christmas story is also a map for this journey—from fear to grace? Herod, Christ, the Star, and the Wise Men aren't just figures; they're archetypes of our soul's path, resonating no matter what we believe. Others have drawn similar connections between the Nativity and the inner life, seeing Herod as the ego, the Magi as inner seekers, and Christ as the birth of divine truth within us, and potentially drawing analogies between all the other players in that story and some aspect of our inner selves. In this post, I want to focus on the core players within that inner story. Rather than unpack every archetype, my aim is to trace the essential movement of the soul as it navigates fear, follows light, and ultimately makes room for truth. Herod: The E...
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The Lie of Blame and the Sacrifice That Frees Us

A Journey to Truth For the past five years, I've returned to two books that have shaped my understanding of relationships and conflict: The Anatomy of Peace and Bonds That Make Us Free   (I recommend the audio book) by the Arbinger Institute founder Terry C Warner, sensing profound truth in their pages but struggling to internalize their promised change. One idea, in particular, haunted me: the claim that “blame is always a lie.”  At first, I found the explanation—that blame ignores our own contributions—too simplistic for the pain of blaming a spouse, a boss, or myself.  But through prayer and reflection, I uncovered deeper truths about why blame is a lie, why it demands a sacrifice, and how we can truly release it. This post shares that journey, weaving insights from Arbinger with Christian and Buddhist wisdom to reveal a path to freedom. Blame Always Requires a Sacrifice Blame is something we all do. When a coworker overlooks us for a project, ...
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Thorns of Knowledge: From Falls to Peace

Several years ago, while reading Joseph Campbell's The Hero with a Thousand Faces (or perhaps another of his works), I encountered a remark that stopped me in my tracks. Campbell suggested that timeless, cultural stories endure because they resonate with the experiences we live in our own lives. At first, I was skeptical. How could ancient accounts, like the LDS interpretation of Adam and Eve, mirror my modern, tech-driven existence? But then it hit me: I've lived that story myself. And chances are, you have too. The Fall: From Innocence to Awareness In the story of Adam and Eve, the couple begins in Eden, a place of innocence and harmony. They eat from the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil, and everything changes. They gain awareness, but at a cost: they're cast out into a world of toil, pain, and thorns (see Moses 4:23–25 in LDS scripture). For years, I thought this was merely a religious allegory. But upon questioning Joseph Campbell...
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Lehi’s Path Anew: Choosing Love Over Fear

In the Book of Mormon, a prophet named Lehi has a vision of a tree bearing life-giving fruit, a narrow path leading to it, and obstacles like a mist of darkness and a great and spacious building ( 1 Nephi 8 ). Traditionally seen as a metaphor for life’s spiritual journey, Lehi’s dream also holds a deeper truth: it’s a pattern we live over and over. Each encounter puts us on the path anew—a chance to choose truth, honor worth, and resist comparison. The Iron Rod: Christ's Guiding Example In Lehi’s dream, an iron rod runs alongside the narrow path, offering a steady guide for those seeking the Tree of Life. It is “the word of God” ( 1 Nephi 11:25 ), but the Word is Christ Himself ( Doctrine and Covenants 93:8 )—not just the message, but the messenger. The rod is His example, guiding us with a simple whisper: “You matter. And they matter.” To hold the rod is to choose compassion and truth in every interaction, following the Spirit’s nudge toward connection ( Moroni 7:16...
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