How Internal State Shapes Stories: Nurturing Your Body for Better Narratives

As I shared in my post on the Path to Action, our stories shape our emotions and actions—but our body’s signals inform those stories. Typically, we think of “see and hear” as external evidence, like others’ actions, but an unbalanced internal state sends sensations—hunger, fatigue, inflammation—that tempt us toward negative narratives. I learned this through decades of struggling with psoriasis, depression, and weight. By caring for my body, I transformed those signals, making it easier to choose blame-free stories of hope and connection. Nurturing our physical selves can deepen our connection with others and ourselves.

A Long Struggle with Signals

Since 1997, I’ve dealt with a recurring rash in an uncomfortable spot. Doctors couldn’t diagnose it, occasionally offering steroid injections or creams that temporarily helped but provided no long-term solution. In 2011, a Seattle dermatologist took a biopsy and identified it as inverse psoriasis, an autoimmune condition. I finally got a prescription, but with warnings about limited use and the need to switch steroids every year or two as my body adapted. By 2017, my health worsened. I struggled to sleep, gaining weight despite exercise, and needed a CPAP for sleep apnea. My steroid cream lost effectiveness, and my dermatologist suggested a “black label” option with cancer risks—something I refused. I also learned I have MTHFR mutations, a genetic quirk impairing nutrient processing, leaving my body in a “nutritional desert” despite ample calories. This fueled inflammation and low energy, feeding stories of frustration and defeat.

Turning Point with Paleo AIP

Constantly depressed and desperate for change, my sleep doctor mentioned an anti-inflammatory diet that helped her lose weight. I dove into research, reading several books, and landed on the Paleo AIP diet, designed for autoimmune conditions like mine. At the beginning of 2018, I went all-in, strictly eliminating prohibited foods and embracing high-quality meats, aiming to control my psoriasis. Within months, it cleared—no more creams, rare flare-ups—and I lost 55 pounds without even trying. The improved signals from my body made it easier to tell stories of confidence, sparking joy and kinder responses to life’s challenges.

Overcoming Depression with Vitamin D3

That first winter after my diet success, I hit a wall. After years in Seattle’s gray climate and a summer of joy, a deep depression struck, making tasks feel impossible. My stories turned to “Everything is hopeless.” A Vitamin D3 deficiency—exacerbated by cutting dairy and the body's struggle to manufacture it in limited sunlight—was the culprit. Supplementing lifted the fog, shifting my narratives to “I can move forward.” My body’s state provided the data; my stories shaped the meaning.

From Blame to Understanding

It might seem like my body’s state controlled my stories, both negative and positive. In those moments, choosing positive stories felt nearly impossible—I was so practiced at blame. I blamed my MTHFR mutations for my psoriasis and inflammation, sleep apnea for robbing me of rest, and Seattle’s gloom for my constant sense of despair, telling myself, “I’ll never thrive here.” But blaming my body or environment excused me from noticing its needs, tying my happiness to things I couldn’t control. When I understood why my body was inflamed and how to support it, I stopped blaming and started nurturing. I didn’t change my body or Seattle—I gave it the nutritional environment it needed, via Paleo AIP, and that shift transformed my perspective.

Breaking the Worth Trap

Initially, I tied my worth to weight loss, feeling “in control.” But hitting a plateau—unable to lose the last 15 pounds despite trainers and books—shifted my story to “I’m a failure,” and “It's my body's fault.” During COVID, I quit the gym and gained 30 pounds back. The issue wasn’t my body; it was the narrative of worth. Now, with a twice-weekly, 15-minute gym routine from The Calorie Myth, I’m losing weight again—not to prove my value, but to care for myself. If I cancel a session, it’s a trade-off for nurturing my whole life, not a failure, fostering peace over shame.

Practical Steps for Nurturing Your Body

Improving your internal state helps you choose better stories. Here’s how:

  1. Listen to Your Body: Notice sensations like hunger, fatigue, or subtle signs like phlegm or fuzziness, which signaled mild inflammation for me. These are data points, not emotions.

  2. Address Deficiencies: Check for issues like Vitamin D3 deficiency. Supplementing lifted my depression by balancing signals that fed hopelessness, though I prefer food sources when possible.

  3. Nourish with Intent: Seek foods that meet your body’s needs, not just calories. An anti-inflammatory Paleo diet worked for me, reducing my “nutritional desert.” Experiment to find what sustains your energy, avoiding empty sugars.

  4. Exercise Smartly: Try short, intense sessions like my 15-minute routine, which triggers growth hormones and signals of vitality, supporting stories of success and life.

  5. Rest and Recover: Prioritize sleep, and consider meditation or yoga. A rested body sends calmer signals, making peaceful stories more natural.

A Spiritual Connection

Our actions stem from emotions, which flow from the stories we tell—stories shaped by both external observations and our body’s internal state. This is why a hungry child can meltdown but calm after eating; their body’s signals shift the narrative. By understanding which foods or habits affect us, we can default to positive stories. My journey taught me my worth isn’t tied to a scale—it’s inherent, freeing me to choose growth-oriented narratives. I’m not perfect, and I still consciously select blame-free stories, but as I care for my body, I feel a deeper connection to others, God, and myself.

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