Freeing Pharaoh

I live in a world where I feel the need to prove myself. I constantly need to prove that I am enough in any of an unlimited number of categories of "enough", such as smart enough, strong enough, cool enough, righteous enough, or wealthy enough. But to whom am I actually proving myself? It seems like I am trying to prove my worth to other people, and as a result, I am constantly waiting for evidence that I have been successful at proving my worth. I am constantly on edge with the fear that I may never be enough. Can I ever give enough evidence to other people to change their minds if they don't want to change their minds? If other people don't actually want to change their minds they will always find a way to keep me from being in the "enough" bucket (For example, thinking to themselves "Yeah, but you're still a jerk!")

I was recently studying Ether chapter 12 . This chapter speaks extensively about faith and weakness, but my perspective on what was actually said about weakness changed. Starting with verse 23 , Moroni starts to worry about his own weakness: 23 ...Lord, the Gentiles will mock at these things, because of our weakness in writing;... And Moroni proceeds to spell out the ways that he is not skilled in writing. Then the Lord comes back with this response in verses 26 through 28 , and  37 :

Lately, I've been watching for definitions within the scriptures. I want to understand what the writers mean when they talk about different concepts, and I want a definition to come from the scriptures rather than the current popular understanding. As I was reading the story written by Zeniff in  Mosiah chapter 10 , I was struck by the definition he gives of "the strength of the Lord." Zeniff, of course, doesn't say "this is the definition of 'the strength of the Lord.'" Instead, he states how the Lamanites were unfamiliar with the Lord or His strength, and proceeds to gives evidence which shows how the Lamanites were unfamiliar. Basically, Zeniff gives a definition through a counter example starting with verse 12. Here are his words, [ adjusted ] a little bit for clarity.

I have pondered for decades about the prophecy of Samuel the Lamanite in Helaman 14:3 . And behold, this will I give unto you for a sign at the time of his coming; for behold, there shall be great lights in heaven, insomuch that in the night before he cometh there shall be no darkness, insomuch that it shall appear unto man as if it was day. I wondered where those lights might have come from, what sort of astronomical event could have triggered them and had them appear exactly when Christ was born. I also wondered about the prophecy in Matthew about the star which heralded Christ's birth. In Matthew 2:2 , it states: Saying, Where is he that is born King of the Jews? for we have seen his star in the east, and are come to worship him. And then in verse 9 : When they had heard the king, they departed; and, lo, the star, which they saw in the east, went before them, till it came and stood over where the young child was. How was it that a star traveled around? And I also had heard argum...

In Matthew 26:24 , we read:  ...Woe unto that man by whom the Son of man is betrayed! it had been good for that man if he had not been born. When reading that, I realized that my assumption is that Jesus is making a judgement about Judas. But thinking about it, I believe now that his statement is actually a statement of empathy. Jesus, in thinking about how the betrayer would feel, knows that the Judas will feel like he wishes he was never born. This is confirmed by the fact that after Jesus' crucifixion, Judas commits suicide. This is partly because I realized that Jesus' statement in Matthew 18:6 : But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea. It seems to me that this statement is not a judgement but is actually empathy. For people who mistreat others, particularly children, when they realize how they have truly treated others, then thos...

Below is the text from a talk I gave a few years ago. It speaks about what I believe the Spirit of Christ to be and how it impacts each of us in our lives.

Moses is revered in many cultures for his work in freeing the people of Israel from Egypt. They were enslaved by the Egyptians, abused, and desperate for freedom. The Israelites started to believe that a savior for their people would rise up within their ranks and free them from their captors. Consequently, pharaoh ordered all the children born at that time to be killed. Moses was born at that time and should have been killed, but his mother placed Moses into a basket and sailed him down the river to where the pharaoh's daughter discovered him and then adopted him. Moses' mom then posed as a nursemaid for pharaoh's daughter and so she was able to safely raise Moses within Pharaoh's own household. This dual motherhood situation allowed Moses to learn all the aspects of the Egyptian ruling class while simultaneously learning all about his Israeli heritage. When Moses was older, he witnessed the abuses that Egyptians were inflicting on the Israelites. He intervened and kil...